Lipstick Prophets FASHION PRODUCTION HOUSE

Dear Theo,

As you know, most of us ladies would rather not have facial hair, but I am finding a few pesky hairs on my chin.

What causes this? And what can I do to alleviate the problem?

I am told it will get worse as I get older. Yikes!

Please help!

- The Tortoise, not the hair!

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Dear Tortoise,

Facial hair on women is first of all, extremely common- so don’t feel like a freak or anything and  it’s caused by hormones. If it gets really out of control for you check with your gynecologist to see if you have a serious hormonal imbalance. Generally it happens when certain hormone levels are higher. If its just a few hairs and not a beard, here is my advice from cheapest to most expensive is:

Tweeze it: get friendly with slanted tweezers. Tweezerman is my favorite and will last forever. There are plenty of cheaper tweezers out there as well.

Wax it: there are plenty of home waxing kits to try from drugstore to fancy shmancy.

Zap it: Laser removal or Electrolysis. This is not a cheap way to go and the hair needs to be dark to be removed by laser not light. And Electrolysis can be painful and leave red bumps for the day. Check in your area for an established establishment; don’t go for a laser student or a bargain bin in this department. You don’t want to end up with burns or scarring for a few whiskers!

Good luck, and chin up.

Xo,

Theo

If you want my sometimes tough – love advice about life, love, beauty and nose hairs; email me at asktheo@gmail.com

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What do you do when the world is in crisis?  How does one remain bright in this mud? Everyday the pitch seems to be getting flatter and flatter.  All the worry and distress is infectious.  An air born illness that has infected the water supplies.  We are all feeding into the vibe with more worry, fear, chaos thinking.  If everyone took just 10 minutes a day to sit the negativity still and be positive think of the energy we could shift.  A simple smile for a stranger.  Letting someone in front of you on line at the market.  Telling someone it’s all going to be ok.  Positivity can be just as contagious.

Anyone with me???

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My cousin had these bunny ear barrettes she whipped out at Easter dinner.

GIMME THOSE!!!

But in the pic I look like I have horns not ears.

Sad bunny.

x

Ali

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I got this yummy and adorable Vegan Easter bunny in my Easter basket from Alison’s Gourmet.  They are this AMAZING company here in California who sells 100% organic 100% vegan treats (cookies, brownies, chocolates, caramels, hell.. even fudge!!

They tend to be a little spendy (shipping will bite u in the arse) but WORTH EVERY LAST DIME!!!

YUM!

xo

and

HAPPY EASTER!!

ALi

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Sometimes thoughts come whizzing through my mind. Sometimes they come over me like getting in a bath. Occasionally they will barely graze me or just give me a “hmm” but not stick around for storage. Then there are the thoughts that come slamming into my skull via my face. This is one of those. Right now my mind wants to debate the minutia of Disappointment vs Devastation. When is which appropriate and why. I need some clarity on this. The human mind really is complex.. or is it? Seems to me people who are not matured emotionally behave in 2 ways. Obvious or opposite. but when is which to come into play? The longer I am on this earth the more transparent people are becoming. And not just my coneys I mean I will size up the kid behind the counter at Taco Bell or the lady taking my change at the toll booth. When does she get devastated? If I tell her she is fat will she be devastated? Will it be met with the same intensity as if I told her her husband is cheating? What if I told her she was fired. What is Disappointing and what is a devastation .

Sometimes I feel like EVERYTHING is devastating. This is usually followed by a period where nothing matters. I think psychologically its considered avoidance due to being overwhelmed.

But I am thinking of making a list of events acceptable to be devastated over and events better left to the lighter disappointment that I can refer to when necessary

things to be Disappointed by:

- Canceled plans.
-ordering food and finding out they are out of it.
-a large cell phone bill
-car getting towed/ticketed
- a zit
-bad hair cut

things to be devastated by:

-death
-divorce
-fire
-terminal illness
-identity theft

Looking at my small beginnings of a list I am getting devastated just thinking about all of the disappointments happening at one time so I would have to make an amendment or clause stating if 6 or more events happen concurrently one may be escorted into devastation.

Ok.. I’m gonna go work on my list.. let me know if you have any suggestions.

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I decided to take some of my favorite posts from when I was blogging over at buzznet and re post them here…

“letting go of the results”

Life gets hard.  Real hard.  Harder than a space age polymer.  Harder that the head of the inexorable boyfriend.  Hard.  Sometimes all I can do is take a moment sit and meditate on what is being presented to me. Why are these situations in my life?  Am I being tested?  What can I pro actively do to make myself more comfortable, move forward, vibrate higher.  OR…. Am I in the eye of a lesson, I need to sit with my feelings, be in the moment, chew my unease.  There is no blueprint, book, or guru who can tell you what is going to happen.  Believe me I have tried.  I have been to COUNTLESS Psychics, Channels, Mystics.  I’ve had Rolfing, Reiki, been to Iridologists, Acupuncturists, Chinese doctors, Nutritionists, Spiritual healers.  I’ve had pranic healing, and laying of the hands..  the search continues.

My point being is sometimes the message is just be.  The universe is taking care of everything.  What is difficult today may have a different light tomorrow.  No matter what happens it is what is supposed to happen.  God’s big plan.  There are no mistakes, you can’t fuck it up.  The universe is going to get you to where you need to be weather you scream and fight, drag your feet, or surrender and be gently carried.  The big clusterfuck for me is staying out of the results “what’s gonna happen?  what if.. what if… what if…   “what if” will either become “what is” or not.  Why worry about it now.  And here is the gold.  All we need to do is be strong, fight hard for what we believe in and let the universe organize around us.  It’s all being done for us.  Everything.  Meant to be and not meant to be is the good news.  Both.  I once heard someone say God has only 2 answers to your prayers… “Yes” and “Not now, I have something better in store for you”.

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Dear Theo,

I am a really fair skinned girl with dark hair and freckles. I want to rock a red lipstick, but I can never find the right color. Everything I have tried makes me feel like a clown! Any tips for me?

Thanks so much!

-Bozo No No

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Dear Bozo No No,

My advice would be to try a more  dark red or ‘vamp’ black cherry/berry red, something that isn’t as much of a ‘true red ‘ and that has more blue tones in it. Perhaps try a gloss that will give you more of an opaque berry- kissed look. A lip stain might work well for you too.

Armour Beauty lip  gloss in ‘Last Dance’, an opaque gorgeous sheer berry color would probably be perfect for you. This gloss is packed with moisturizers (shea butter, avocado, olive, mango seed butters and oils, vitamin E, grape seed oil) and is made to stay on your lips- not fall off in 10 minutes like so  many lip glosses do. Obsessive Compulsive Cosmetics has amazing lip products called ‘Lip Tars’ in a huge range of berry to brick reds that stay on and stain really nicely as well.

Hope this turns your clown frown upside down.

Xo,

Theo

If you want my sometimes tough – love advice about life, love, beauty and nose hairs; email me at  asktheo@gmail.com

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Busy busy working, designing, starting 2 NEW LINES!!!!! crazy.

WAIT until you see!!  love love love.

LP will still deliver… just deliver a little more

Who wants to name the new line?? I have one already registered but the 2nd one I am still unsure of… Free clothes for life if I use your idea!!!

Any geniuses out there?

GO!!

XO

ALI

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I just noticed I haven’t blogged in a hot minute here. You see, since I started bloggin here on LP I notice I think in “blog” now.  Every time I am in a note worthy situation I start mentally writing a blog.  For example:  On Wednesday I was on a flight to Phoenix and I was seated next to a twisty haired indy casualty with uber tude and all I could think about was how the blog would sound about her. Her and her bagpipes squealing over plucked guitar blaring through her headphones.  Her and her indy girl dreadlocks of blonde and pink. Her and her too cool for please and thank you when the flight attendants provided snacks. Her and her Bono bug eye sunglasses, her and her “Fell in love with a band” book. Her and her need to be annoying whilst being annoyed.

Also…the blog I mentally wrote about the Phoenix Airport, the one about buying a new car (that one I should actually write), the one about my dinner with Bud Court, the one about my Vegan mad hatter dinner party, etc, etc, etc.

The problem is.. finding the time to actually WRITE the damn blog and also photo documenting life as you live it does not always happen.  Although I think in blog I do not remember to photograph for real.  poo.

So here is my blog… no photo and not really about anything.

Are you ok with that?

x

Ali

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Drawn straight out of my straw cowgirl hat….

This weeks blog comment contest winner is Dani Bouvier!

She is on twitter too @danielabouvier – congrats, dear.

To those who did not win: we will announce another winner next Monday.

*The more you read/comment, the better your chances of winning.

Click on the “WIN stuff” category in the right menu & check  out the archives for more info.

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